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What to do when you got nothing

The fear of all writers has struck.  I got nothing.  Not an intelligent thought in this head.  Nothing. Nada. Zero.  It’s been taunting me since last night.

It whispered all morning in my ear.  Nothing.  I am empty.  I thought about being empty.  If you are empty than you need to fill yourself.  With what?  And why am I empty?  I shouldn’t be empty because I’ve slept more in the last year than I have in ten.  Seriously.  My brain should be firing on all cylinders.  Creative energy should be oozing out of me.  Instead I am cavernous.   I got nothing.

Back to the question.  If I’m empty then what do I fill myself up with?  Not something more to do.  My TO DO list is already too long.  I don’t want to just fill myself with more busyness.  It’s life-sucking.  I want life-giving.

Over the whispers of nothing and empty came one word.  Jesus.  I knew it was truth.  I didn’t want it to be cliche though.  You know how it can be.  I want it to be real.  I want it to make a difference.

Yesterday at bible study Beth Moore mentioned that Jesus was real.  It was like someone hit me on the head.  He was a real life person!   Not just some bible character, a caricature.  John 1:14 says, “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us.  We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.”   I need to grapple with that.  What does that mean for me and my life?  What does that look like lived out?  He became human and dwelt here on earth.  Some would say it doesn’t mean anything because it was 2000 years ago.  I disagree.  I think it’s highly relevant and it’s a question that every Jesus believer should be asking themselves.  It means something that He became real flesh and blood.  This is just a start:

Love: He’s the embodiment of love.  He came because He loved us.  He represents His Father who loved us so much that He sent His one and only son.  (John 3:16)  He died because He loved us.  He showed us how to love others and told us this was the most important business for us.

Grace: He gave us grace.  None of us deserved it.  He still gave it.

Truth:  He is all truth.  He never lies.

What does this have to do with filling me?  With filling you?  It’s a good question.  The more people were around Jesus the more they wanted to be.  Beth Moore in her study, Jesus the One and Only, describes him as a “favourite” person.  He was life-giving.  Not just in words but actions too.  Read the gospels.  The disciples.  Mary Magdalene.  Mary and Martha.  James, his brother.  Paul in his one encounter on a road.  He entered into all these peoples lives and they were forever changed.

Shouldn’t that be how my relationship is with Him?  Shouldn’t I be changed?  Shouldn’t I be ever evolving to be more like Him?  I think I’ve plateaued in many areas.  Become complacent.  Content even, to go with the status quo.  Maintaining the status quo can get boring.  Stagnant.  That’s when the water needs to be drained.

John wrote that they had seen Him and were writing to tell others of what they had witnessed and who they had lived with for three years.  Do I really see Him?  Do I see his fingerprints on my life?  In the everyday?  In the funny or the mundane?  Do I stop.and.just.see.Him?  Sadly, most days: not so much.

Maybe I’m at the point of empty because I need to open my eyes.  I’ve forsaken the love I knew first.  He’s been quietly waiting for a while for me to see Him.  I’ve had too many other things vying for attention.  It’s time to get reacquainted with Him.  To be filled again with Jesus.   It’s a good place to begin.